Years ago, a close family member got sick, and we didn’t know if he would survive. He went to countless hospitals and kept getting worse.
I lived far away and felt helpless. I flew six times over six months to help, but it never seemed like it was enough.
I could’ve hidden the news about my family member’s sickness, but God showed me how to ask for help. Some things are too big for one person, or even one family, to undertake alone.
We should seek out others to pull together when the edges of our lives start to fray.
My friends spent many evenings driving me to the airport. When my car died the morning after arriving home from a late flight, my roommate gave me a ride to work.
Another friend let me stay at her place when my roommates were away so I wouldn’t have to be alone.
Cultivate Friendships During Good Seasons
“Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. Furthermore, if two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone? And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart.” – Ecclesiastes 4:9–12 NASB
When I led a Bible study in my early 20s, I tried to present a perfect example and know all the answers to tough questions. One of my friends informed me everyone knew I wasn’t perfect, so I could relax.
Though shocked at the statement, the truth resonated.
Our relationships deepened as we shared our joys and sorrows with each other.
Those authentic moments freed me to ask them for help when life fell apart.
When the bad news of my family member’s sickness came, I sent an email to my Bible study ladies and prayer group from Sunday School. That first email turned into a series of updates on the health of my family member.
Even when I lagged in sending updates, these friends reached out for more information. They were praying for God’s intervention and invested in the outcome.
Their prayers carried my family through that stressful season.
We embarked on a journey of chronic illness where we kept needing to ask for help.
One friend appreciated my requests for assistance because then she felt confident to reach out in her tough times.
When we model asking and receiving help, others are free to follow that pattern themselves.
Ask for Help Without Shame
Jesus said, “In this world you will have trouble” (Jn 16:33 NIV). Jesus meant all who followed Him would face struggles on this earth.
Since no one is exempt from hardship, we shouldn’t feel ashamed asking for help.
Even Jesus asked the disciples to watch and pray with Him the night before His crucifixion.
I remember lamenting to a friend about how I had to ask for help so many times. She told me that in the same way I liked to help others, other people enjoyed serving me.
When we admit we need assistance, people find us relatable and want to help. We should allow others the joy of serving us.
Bear One Another’s Burdens
“Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ” – Galatians 6:2 NASB
The Greek word for “burden” is baros, meaning a heaviness, weight, burden, or trouble.1
Burdens are like a heavy boulder too big for one person to lift on her own. We need other people to help shoulder the weight.
When life falls apart, we can’t always bear the troubles by ourselves.
God designed the body of Christ to serve as a support system so each member stays healthy.
This doesn’t mean we don’t carry our own load (Gal 6:5). But when our burdens become too heavy to bear alone, we should ask for help.
When we ask our friends and the local church for help, the body of Christ cares for herself.
Seek the Local Church
“For there was not a needy person among them, for all who were owners of land or houses would sell them and bring the proceeds of the sales and lay them at the apostles’ feet, and they would be distributed to each to the extent that any had need.” – Acts 4:34-35 NASB
What if we don’t have close friends or family nearby?
Many churches have member care services to help parishioners in times of need.
They typically can connect us to everything from clothes closets and food pantries to paying for electric or rent bills. Some even have prayer ministries.
The best way to get help is simple—just ask!
We don’t have to send an email to a large group of friends, but consider texting a neighbor. Or calling someone in a small group from church.
Start small and work up, if necessary. Don’t let fear rule.
Reach out for the lifeline of community God sends. Most people want to help.
If someone declines, don’t take it personally. We don’t know what challenges they may be facing. Another person should be happy to assist.
While times may be tough now, one day we’ll have our turn to bear another sister-in-Christ’s burdens.
Take the plunge today. Ask for help and embrace the blessing it brings.
Joanna Eccles
Joanna Eccles founded Words from the Honeycomb to share sweet words to encourage people in Christ. She has led Bible studies for over 15 years and desires to shape culture through her writing by addressing truths in relatable ways. Joanna can’t wake up without a cup of coffee, loves reading, and lives in Florida. Connect with Joanna on Facebook and X.
1 Thayer’s Greek Lexicon
